50in07 News + Tonights HOT TAKES
The mother fuckin' playoffs are here. I really do believe that the NHL has the best playoff action in sports, as ANYTHING can happen. I enjoy tweeting my hot takes because it definitely stirs the pot up. The best is when I predict a nearly impossible blowout like 11-0 and some hardo from Massachusetts will be like "Bro, you're a fucking idiot!!!" yeah dude, that was a JOKE, calm your nut sack as soon as you get a chance. And no, I don't hate Mass, I lived there for a bit. I mostly just hate Jack Edwards. I'm going to sum up my hot takes below so here we go:
BOSTON/OTTAWA: Here's the thing about this series. I watch a LOT of Boston and I DON'T watch a lot of Ottawa. I think that the Bruins have this "never quit" attitude that will always keep them in this shit. Adam McQuaid is truly a fucking warrior. Everyone asks, why do you tweet about McQuaid so much? The reason is because he has the balls to literally just sit down indian style in front of a 100 MPH Clap rocket. I know he gets paid to, but the guy has some serious balls. There's nothing I love more than a savage willing to sacrifice their face for the squad. Also, Tim Schaller is back in the line-up. Playing for his childhood team in the playoffs, there's no doubt that this guy will come out flying while making little to no mistakes. If I'm the Bruins GM, I'm giving Tim Schaller a 2 year, 1 way, deal worth $1.8M per year after this season, no fucking question about it. You need a mistake-free bottom 6 in this league. I think Boston wins the series but what the fuck do I know?
NEW YORK/MONTREAL: Another toss up. Dude, I have no fucking clue. Henrik can steal games but so can Price, so that cancels out or something like that. Julien might whip some crazy coaching out of his ass for the playoffs because let's face it, the dude is experienced. I think the Rangers will have some defensive breakdowns that'll cost them. But I also think they have playoff scoring fire power. I'm taking New York to win tonight.
PITTSBURGH/COLUMBUS: I think Tortorella's team might be tired. I probably shouldn't judge because I get tired going up the stairs, but the shitty play at the end of the season has said something to me. It'll be interesting to see how they come out. Being that the Penguins are a little banged up, I think that might help Columbus get back on track. I say CBJ wins tonight
MINNESOTA/ST. LOUIS: Do you really think that St. Louis will be able to counter the forceful power behind Eric Staal's NASA helmet? If you do...you better buckle up buddy because Eric Staal has a laboratory in his helmet that will calculate every pass every hit and every scoring chance available, thus making it IMPOSSIBLE for St. Louis to even score a single goal in this series. Minnesota is going to win with a sweep and win by at least 5 goals each game.
SAN JOSE/EDMONTON: Edmonton is back in this bitch folks. McDavid....words can't even describe how good this fucking kid is at hockey. It's absolutely bananas. There's nothing that makes my pants stand up more than seeing McJesus accelerate with the puck. It's insane. San Jose has absolutely 0 chance in France in winning this series. Edmonton wins tonight.
So there we go. I don't know who read this all the way, but if you did, feel free to let me know so I feel like I didn't waste my time. Also - I'm releasing three new shirts this week for 50 in '07. It's pretty awesome that it's been 4 years and the audience continues to ignite the brand. I'm hoping to roll out to stores VERY soon too. I'll be announcing all the details on Fireball Friday on my instagram live. The quality of these shirts will be unmatched, I sometimes wonder who remembers the first shirts I released..it's pretty insane how much better all my shit has gotten quality-wise...it's about damn time. I'm out - #50in07